Certified PC technician

Certified PC technician

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Awareness of Life

I just finished watching a movie that was too close to home for me. I feel I have to let this out and make it noticed maybe someone out there is feeling how I have felt in the past and maybe this can help. There are times when we fall into a dark phase in our lives… I experienced a period of my life where I truly had everything that was important everything that mattered. I did not appreciate anything..all I knew is I wanted to die. I did not want to face the facts of the life cycle with loved ones. I just felt like a weak person who just wanted to give up on life. I used to take pain killers or sleeping aids just to get sleepy and spend most of my time sleeping. Anyone who looked at me and the life I had would not understand why. Now that I look back I wonder why as well. Borderline Personality Disorder, this is what I came to find out I had while I was pregnant. This clarified so much for me as to why I felt how I felt why I did what I did..

    The pill popping is a very shameful thing I have to say. Only two people in my life have seen and experienced what I have done. I would take pills anytime something stressful occurred or I had a problem or something did not go away. The events went from being very stressful events to something as simple as I got another assignment to do or the food I bought did not meet my expectations. There are factors to everything and I tried to figure out what could have triggered this type of behavior.

    There are so many side effects and long term damages of taking too many pills, I have been lucky to not have caused any damage to my body. Some of the effects are ulcers and constipation are some. The worst is death… yet this is what many pill poppers attempt to achieve by doing this. Sometimes I guess like in my case the thought of death was always there, if I take so many what would happen? Am I going to die if I mix this one with that one? If the consequence is death it was not a bad outcome in my mind… I would no longer have to face any minor hardship that comes with life. I started with 3 to 4 motrins or Tylenols but I usually opted for ibuprofen.. Gradually the quantity increased and the intervals increased as well. I honestly do not even want to mention how many I had taken on a daily basis because it's shameful and wrong. I then began to feel it was not enough and started looking towards prescribed medications and combining medications. I would say this must have been the stupidest and most dangerous behavior. There came a time when I remember all I would think about was when my next moment to take more pills was.

    This dangerous behavior went on for a long time. After a while I came to realize if I continue this I was going to end up dying. The thought of it did not bother me it was actually comforting. I pray God forgives me for wasting my life and my health the way I did. I then became pregnant and knew this behavior had to cease immediately for my baby's health. I have to say stopping as abruptly as I had to, it was so difficult but I did it. I did have moments where I felt pregnancy was too much for me and I did not want to care about anything anymore but I restrained from doing anything. Once my daughter was born I still did not feel that urge to continue to live and I hated it so much because I now had a reason to live. I loved my daughter more than anything in the world but I don't think I was aware of life itself. My destructive behavior continued after a few months of having my daughter. I did nothing like I was doing before but I would take prescribed medication anytime something painful occurred or I had something stressful happen basically anything that did not go my way or make me happy. This was definitely something I knew I could not continue because I was now a mom and had to take care of my daughter and be a positive role model.

    Veronika Decides to Die… a movie I just saw that I think just brings out the awareness of life and helps one appreciate every ticking minute. I cried watching this movie mainly because it made me realize how much time I wasted. How much I could have done in the meantime and how many experiences I passed up because I was too focused on making sure I continue to sleep. I hope that anyone out there who may feel even just a little down on life reads this and even watches the movie… it gives such a new refreshing appreciation of life.. This behavior gradually worsens quickly. My pregnancy stopped me from getting too far or hurting myself more, I was lucky my beautiful daughter saved me. But this does not go away and no you cannot usually stop anytime. It takes a lot of discipline and definitely some professional therapy.Like I said when I was pregnant I saw a therapist for 3 months and he diagnosed me with BPD. This may have factored into my behavior. I am very thankful for my life and I want to make the best of it each day for my daughter. This is probably the darkest most shameful secret I have. Yet I am putting it out there for anyone else who goes through the same to know you aren't alone and life is a miracle cherish every minute that passes.

Bebe a la Kardashian

Soo seems the Kardashian sisters keep real busy along with a jewelry line they also have a limited clothing line with Bebe.. There are two items I like and am going to go check out possibly this weekend. Those are the mesh bodice mini dress and the goddess wrap dress.

Kardashian Armenian virgins saints and angels jewelry line

The Kardashian sisters are finally showing some of what their line of jewelry look like and its cute.  I don't think anything extravagant of it but it's suppose to have an Armenian inspiration.  They will showcasing their collection at the Project  trade show in Vegas on February 17 at Mandalay Bay at booth number 2153. For anyone who is interested.

Bipasha Basu’s beauty Regime

Bipashas Basu a Bollywood star     

• Drink 10 glasses of water a day
  
• Apply sunscreen with a high SPF every time I step out in the sun
  
• Eat small meals, around six times a day at regular intervals. Involve the superfoods in your diet judiciously.
  
• Exercise 4 times a week at minimum for an hour a day
  
• Minimum 7-8 hours of sleep a day
  
• Use good quality make up products
  
• Removal of make up is very important too
  
• 
  
  Keep your skin clean
  
  • NORMAL TO DRY SKIN – half cup cold milk + 5 drops of olive/sesame oil. Put this in a bottle and shake well. Cleanse skin with cotton wool with this mixture twice a day. Softens the Skin.
    
  • OILY SKIN – Rose water + Lemon Juice in same proportions. Cleanse your skin with it or keep it on for 10 minutes and wash. Reduces pimples and acne.
    
  • OILY TO COMBINATION SKIN – one fourth teaspoon Lemon Juice + One teaspoon cold milk + one teaspoon Cucumber Juice. Cleanse face with this and wash.
    
• Hydrate your skin with moisturizer from a good brand depending on your skin type
  
• 
  
  Use natural homemade face scrubs and packs
  
  • NORMAL TO DRY SKIN – one teaspoon Gram Flour (besan) + one teaspoon Lemon Juice + one teaspoon Sesame Oil + one teaspoon Milk powder. Apply on face for 15 minutes, dampen with water and rub off gently. Wash.
    
  • OILY TO COMBINATION SKIN – one teaspoon Gram Flour (besan) + One teaspoon Lemon Juice + One teaspoon Rice Flour + Two teaspoon Yoghurt. Apply on face for 15 minutes, dampen with water and rub off gently. Wash.
    
• Eye care- before sleeping put almond oil around your eyes using your ring finger gently
  
• Hair should always be cleaned with a good shampoo and conditioner. (I personally, like my brand Clinic All Clear, it's for all hair types). Once a month, a deep conditioning treatment must be done. Take one teaspoon vinegar + one teaspoon glycerine + one egg. Beat it together well. Massage mixture into scalp. Then wrap the hair in a hot towel for 20 minutes before washing. This gives the hair body and bounce and it keeps it shiny and manageable. Also, I highly recommend a head massage, once a fortnight with olive, coconut, or almond oil mixed with castor oil
  
• Good pedicure and manicure is a must
  
• 
  
  Do not overlook the body and only take care of the face. For body apart from a wash use a scrub occasionally
  
  • OILY SKIN – Gram Flour (besan) + a little Turmeric Powder + Yoghurt. Apply paste for 20 minutes on the entire body. Scrub it off with  water, for healthy glowing skin
    
  • DRY SKIN – Gram Flour (besan) + a little Turmeric Powder + Cream of milk (malai). Apply paste for 20 minutes on the entire body. Scrub it off with  water, for healthy glowing ski
    

EATING HABITS  \  One constant question that people keep asking me is how well, or badly I eat, to keep my figure. I know a lot of people expect me to tell them about diets and calories, but I prefer a better tack. Know your food and make sure that your body has all the nutrients it needs.

 1.    Garlic, Onions, Leeks, Chives, Shallots – Enhances elimination of toxins and carcinogens, helps prevent cancer.
2.    Barley – Lowers blood cholesterol levels, protects against cancer, good source of vitamin B, keeps blood sugar levels stable.
3.    Green Foods – (Wheat grass, barley grass, spirulina). Diminishes allergies, protects liver from toxins and lowers BP and cholesterol.
4.    Beans and Lentils – low in fat, calories and sodium, but high in complex carbohydrates and dietary fibres. These also provide essential fatty acids like omega-6s and are an excellent source of protein.
5.    Hot Peppers (Sweet Bell Peppers and Hot chilis) - anti inflammatory, analgesic, anti cancer, source of vitamin c, arthritis relief, sinus soother and fat burner.
6.    Nuts and Seeds (macadamia, almonds, pistachios, peanuts, sesame seeds, flax seed, walnuts, pumpkin seeds) – decreases risk of cancer, heart diseases and diabetes. Helps in weight control and reduces wrinkles and sagging skin
7.    Sprouts – high source of protein and vitamin c
8.    Yoghurt – rich in calcium which helps in weight reduction and it enhances immune functions
9.    Berries and Plums (strawberries, raspberries, cherries, blueberries, gooseberries) – these are anti-aging and reduces cardiac problems, arthritis and cancer.
10.    Oranges and Lemons – these boost collagen production, which Is the building block of skin tissues.
11.    Tomatoes – it raises the skin sun protection factor (SPF), works like an internal sun block.
12.    Fish (salmon, trout and mackerel) – these are rich in omega-3 which is great for good skin.
13.    Water – hydrates cells and flushes toxins making skin radiant.

SKIN DAMAGERS
1.    Sugar – it causes zits, unwanted calories, and enlarges skin pores.
2.    Packaged foods – gives constipation, which affects skin badly as these foods lack fibre.
3.    Crash Diets – you lose the skin glow by not eating and depriving your body of its nutrients.

Over or Under the Toilet Paper Usage Analysis

So I truly love statistics and research. I saw the commercials about the over or under by Cottonnelle. They had America voting at CottonelleRollePoll.com. It got me thinking if how you position your toilet paper roll matters it must assist in determining something about your personality. I decided to do some research to see if anyone has attempted to do an analysis of this before I looked into doing my own research on it.

From my taking I think this must have some way of telling whether an individual is a type A or type B personality. I did find the analysis of the Survey by Cottonelle. Found at http://investor.kimberly-clark.com/releasedetail.cfm?ReleaseID=440769. This survey basically says those who roll over are individuals who like to take charge and are organized over achievers. Those who roll under are typically more laid-back dependable and aim for relationships with strong foundations. Those who do not care for this debate and just worry about having paper or not are individuals who are flexible and like new situations they also like to have minimal conflict.

These findings helped and basically covered what I was curious in learning about this whole poll. I wanted to share this for those who might find it interesting. Research is a passion and I'm looking to find something to research that has not been done yet. If anyone has any ideas let me know and I'll look into it. Finding new facts and statistics is always interesting.

Milly for Clinique Makeup 8 piece gift set

Exclusively at Bloomingdales from Feb 7-21 if you buy something from Clinique for only $25 you get this for free. It's really cute. It has:

• Mascara in black
• Redness Solutions instant relief mineral powder with blush
• Skin tone correcting moisturizer SPF 20
• Dramatically different moisturizing lotion
• Rinse-off eye makeup solvent
• Clinique foldover mirror
• lastly a Clinique keychainwith long lasting lipstick mini in Grape

 and long last glosswear SPF 15 in pink.

Really awesome.

Kim Kardashian fitness DVD

The Kim Kardashian DVD workouts are actually really good. I just had to try them out for myself and see how well it works. I just received the DVDs through the mail and I tried out two of the workouts in two days and I do feel a huge difference. I'm definitely a pilates person but these are easy to do and get the job done.  I do recommend to use these if you don't have the time to hit the gym or are just to lazy to get out of the house. Or if you are a stay at home mom with kids.  I purchased at Amazon like I purchase everything there.

MAC VIVA Glam VII

MAC VIVA GLAM 7 OK so for everyone who loves Lady Gaga and Cyndi Lauper here are their inspired new lipsticks by MAC highly pigmented colors. They are $14 each and have already sold out at Bloomingdales. As soon as I get a hold of one I will do a swatch and show you what it looks like.

Georgeous Ring I love!

I bought this ring about a month ago but I still am so inlove with it. I wear it all the time and it only cost me $5!! Purchased at Street Smart in Kearny NJ

Here is my daughter modeling it.. so adorable..

80 Pocket Jewelry Storage

I love Jewelry and buy so  much whether it's from forever 21, amiclubwear, electriqueboutique or my local favorite boutique streetsmart. This has been one of the easiest and most convenient ways of storing my jewelry.  I have one of 36 pockets but of course I ran out of space for all my new purchases. So i just ordered a new one which is this one shown here. It has 80 pockets which is amazing because then I will be able to put one pair of earings or a few rings in each pocket. Will take pictures when I receive it and I organize my jewelry in it. 

Victoria's Secret

So I went to Victoria's Secret and purchased my favorite perfume ever.. yea I know it's been around but nothing beats this.  Very Sexy perfume now has a new square bottle but the fragrance is the same. It's "a sultry  blend of sensual vanilla orchid, sparkling clementine, and juicy blackberry"... yum =-)

I purchased the gift set because for $8 more I got a mini perfume along with the body wash and lotion.  As you can see I also purchased the victoria's secret conditioners. 

The first bottle is glossing conditioner the second is volumizing and the third is nourishing conditioner for dry or damaged hair. I can't mention enough how amazing these conditioners are. I do not like the shampoos much because they leave alot of residue but the conditioners are amazing they detangle your hair instantly and leave your hair soft and smooth. Not to mention the great scent they have that stays.

I just had to blog about some of my favorite products that I got so excited purchasing. I also want to share that Victoria's Secret is having a really cute free gift with your purchase.

Chegg.com College textbooks for rent!

New semester is here and it's crazy how expensive books are. for all you college students who are looking for ways of getting your books without throwing out so much cash there is a way. Other than purchasing books at half.com you can rent books. CHegg.com is a great site to do this, site actually plants a tree for every book you rent, buy or sell which is really cool because it is ecofriendly. here is the link:

 http://www.chegg.com/ecofriendly/

CherryCulture.com

Recently purchased a few products from Cherryculture.com. NYX products great. I absolutely love them because they are not too pricey but great quality. one of my favorite products is the NYX. I have the NYX lipstick in the Harmonica shade. It is a beautiful color smooth and lasts a while. It is on sale for $1.75 this is the third time I am purchasing it. It's great to wear under lipgloss. I usually line my lips with the NYX lip liner in Natural. 

This other product that I purchased for the first time, is the Super Volume Lip Plumper. I wanted to try it for fun since many times the product tingles but no other effect. This lip plumper actually worked I was amazed with it because after it tingled I actually saw the difference. Next time I use it I will put up a picture.  

I purchased some NYX eyeshadows as well I love these because they have great pigmentation and they are great price for the quality. The colors are exquisit. Love love love!

Made some new purchases I am waiting on: MAC liptint, and eyeslipsface.com haul. I also purchased some super sexy boots at amniclubwear I have been wearing adore. will put up reviews another time on those items.

Urban Decay Alice In Wonderland Palette

I absolutely love Urban Decay Palettes. I am so excited with the upcoming release of the Alice In Wonderland Palette. The palette will be available for purchase January 15, 2010. Still no news about the price, but I will definitely purchase this and have a review about this product.

The Unemployed College Graduate

Recession or not you would think that after so much sacrifice in studying and student loans you would find stability in the workforce. It's kind of scary when you think about it. As a college graduate with a B.A. I am still not able to find a job... how low are the hopes of others who probably only made it to high school. Either way sometimes it seems that education is overrated opposed to luck and networking. The unemployment rate in New Jersey is still high at 9.7% as of December 16, 2009 (www.nj.com). New extension was passed but what happens after that? High hopes to have a rapidly improving economy this year.